‘Gee, fair few people at this law ball thing,’ thought minimum wage worker, Simon Pints (18), as he carefully finished pouring a watered-down vodka lemonade to another disgruntled third-year.

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It truly is the night of nights - a perfect opportunity for university students from all walks of private school life to let down their hair, blow off some steam, and potentially run into their ex and have a cry - no, we’re not talking about your Aunt Mildred’s weeding reception, we’re talking about the annual law ball.

Cynics, however, have again argued that the event is bound to be an overpriced, overrated, overhyped and underperforming shambles of an affair.

Their concerns are wide-ranging: will mum take a photo of us at pre’s with our eyes open? Will the vego slider have gluten in it? Will the band play Untouched by the Veronicas? Will the floor be sticky??? Will the after-party seccy not let you in cos ‘you looked at [him] funny’? And most importantly, will the drinks line devolve into a rank mosh pit?

In spite of these concerns, we note that these same so-called ‘cynics’ have each caved in and bought a ticket for the spritely price of $125.

Nonetheless, we contacted the UQLS Exec for comment in respect of these issues, who advised us: ‘We want to reassure all law ball attendees that each and every inevitable fuck up is out of our control and never happened’.

Only time will tell whether a ‘Royal Affair’ will end up being a Royal cock up.

More to come.