‘Holidaying? Never heard of it, mate. I’m a global nomad.’

Holding court in the shared kitchen of Amsterdam’s nineteenth-best hostel (ranked in terms of cleanliness, atmosphere, and how likely it is that the bloke in the bed below you is clearly having a wank), British backpacker Amanda Vassey (23) is making sure everyone is well aware of her philosophy and approach to life.

As people just try to make their pesto pasta and be on their way, Amanda is making it abundantly clear that she is not mistaken for a ‘tourist’ on ‘holiday.’ And she’s got the ink to prove it.

Rolling up the sleeve of her shirt that’s been washed twice in two months, she proudly displays her map of the world tattoo to the room at large, the different colours punctuating the pale skin that is a classic hallmark of a life spent under the ‘scorching’ British sun.

‘See? Now, tell me what fucking tourist would have a tattoo like that. Name one. Seriously. You can’t.’

Whilst not getting a lot of engagement from other hostel guests, most of whom are more concerned about how far fourteen euros can stretch them over the next five days, Amanda is happy to press on, monologuing to thin air moreso than Macbeth when he started getting all suspicious and shit in Macbeth (we haven’t seen it for a while).

‘Each country I visit, I get another part of the tattoo coloured in. It really reminds me to stay grounded, and remember that we’re all a connected part of this connected world.’

Despite the fact she’s happy to declare she ‘stays grounded’ as a result of the tattoo, weekly transfers of $400AUD from Mum and Dad at home have certainly helped.

More to come from this fascinating, worldbeating figure.