The Small Council of Westeros has seen a major reshuffle after a leadership change late yesterday rocked the power dynamics of the capital.
Daenerys Targaryen’s reign will be remembered as one of the shortest in recent memory, after her inner circle changed allegiances in a spill on the floor of the Throne Room.
The new leader, Bran the Really Fucking Broken, is a political novice who supporters hope can unite the realm around his good looks, boyish charm and ability to get inside the minds of disengaged citizens.
The young King’s first task was to choose his council. In a surprise choice, former cutthroat Bronn of Highgarden has been named Master of Coin.
Yielding limited fiscal experience, Bronn begun his first economic summit by floating a fairly divisive idea.
‘M’lords, I spent the weekend looking at it and it does seem to me that this whole franking credits business is a bit of a gift.’
The declaration sent shivers through the council chambers. Cash refunds for franking credits was how many Westerosi common folk funded their retirement. Many pensioners in Westeros, some as old as 38, depended on these credits.
Not to be deterred by conventional political wisdom, Bronn pushed his case. ‘It just feels like we have this generous social welfare scheme that Lord Baelish enacted and to keep that in place without reigning in these credits isn’t sustainable.’
Behind closed doors, party insiders say this is a mistake. ‘He’s showing he’s new to this,’ one unnamed and unarmed source told The Obiter.
‘Attempts to close the franking credit loophole have been politically toxic in Westeros since before Aerys.’
Bronn today released figures explaining that the refund costs the Crown more than expenditure on City Watch, armada and mega dragon rapid fire spears combined.
‘This is fiscally irresponsible and economically misguided,’ Bronn said in a conference many inside the Red Keep have described as amateurish.
‘He has no clue what he’s doing,’ a well-regarded economist explained. ‘Bronn is trying to reach into your pockets and grab what is yours. It’s a tax, nothing more nothing less.’
King Broken Little Bran Boy was reportedly negotiating a peace treaty between the First Men and the Children of the Forest when asked to comment on the supposed incompetency of a senior master.
‘He’s doing exactly what he must.’
More to come.