By the time you are reading this, a lot will have been written about what has already been described as ‘the single most deranged decision in the history of commercial television.’
Channel 9 are no strangers to controversy; in fact, they’ve often invited it. However, the intrigue of conflict that has so often fuelled ratings for the network dynasty has backfired spectacularly this week after their announcement of a spin-off of their hit social experiment ‘Married At First Sight.’
‘After the roaring success of MAFS,’ a statement from Channel 9 read, ‘we have decided to expand the scope of the experiment. It is in that spirit that we are excited to announce ‘Married At Last Sight.’
Inviting applicants aged between 87 – 104, Channel 9 explained that the show would revolve around the final weeks of contestants’ lives.
The contestants would be coerced by Channel 9 into deciding to discontinue life support before being introduced to their spouse. Reportedly, the spouses will be local celebrities who will sign 45-minute contracts for their involvement. At press time, Nick Kyrgios, Julia Morris and Joel Creasey had already jumped on board.
‘The idea is basically that they meet the love of their life at the end of their life,’ producer Gareth Peen told The Obiter.
‘To be honest, I don’t really have a justification but we just reckon old people getting married is a bit funny. We hope viewers agree!’
Viewers did not.
In the hours following the release, QLD Health and aged care facilities across the nation announced their livid disapproval of the proposed program.
‘So, what, they just consent to euthanasia, and then Channel 9 rush a spouse in and marrying them off just in time?’ asked Federal Health Minister Greg Hunt in a press conference, where he seemed less angry about the concept than he was genuinely baffled about the logistics.
‘It’s just so fucked.’
Channel 9 have not backed down and will push ahead with the idea. Initial ratings predictions have forecasted an average nightly audience of 2.01 million.
So, so much more to come.