Another day, another dollar for A-G Christian Porter who continues to enjoy paid leave following reports of rape.

Porter is still yet to face the music as it was revealed he would not be stepping down and there would be no inquiry into his actions to confirm whether he is, in fact, a massive crook.

Australia’s female lawyers on the other hand have not fared quite so well. Despite statistics confirming at least 1-5 women are sexually assaulted in their lifetime, Australia has decided now is NOT the time to hold men accountable.

This follows after it was revealed that the CEO of Shminter Shmellison, Shannette Shkimmitt, will leave the firm after her position was “untenable”. The Obiter have interpreted the email Shkimmitt reportedly sent to staff as saying “what the fuck you scummy bastards? I honestly expected better from the lot of you than to do this man a favour and represent him!”

In a shocking turn of events, Porter and Minister Reynolds, who are directly accountable to the public, are not being forced to step down and will continue to enjoy their leave. Who would have thought that it would be lawyers at big bad corporate firms who would be held to a higher standard of accountability than our elected officials?

Please dear god, no more to come.